In Pakistan, there are loved ones in a nearby qabristan of every Muslim family. We go there on Fridays, during Eid, or after tours, many of us. But little do you know what the Sunnah really teaches of these visits. This guide is an easy-to-understand explanation of visiting graves in Islam to all. You will be taught the proper etiquette, the most opportune times and what to carry. We will also give you tips on how you can locate the grave without straining. An honorable visit will comfort you and will bless your loved ones.
Why Visiting Graves Is Encouraged in Islam
Initially, the Prophet ﷺ prohibited the Muslims to go to graves in early Islam. He afterwards permitted such visits to be renewed and proclaimed it in plain language.
“I have forbidden you to go to graves, but now you may go to them.”
This hadith is found in Sahih Muslim, 977, by the companion Buraydah. In addition, Tirmidhi 1054 says that graves will remind you of the Hereafter. The reason of visiting the graves in Islam is mostly to remember the death and our ultimate reunion. It makes the heart soft, and reminds us that this world will end. In addition, the visit allows us to pray to parents, grandparents, and people that are dead.
The Sunnah Dua When You Enter a Graveyard
The Prophet ﷺ instructed his followers about a special greeting in the graveyard. In particular, it is located in the Sahih Muslim, hadith 975, Buraydah.
As-salamu alaykum ahlad-diyari minal mu-minina wal muslimin, wa inna in sha Alluh bikum la lahiqun. As’alullah lana wa lakumul ‘afiyah.
It welcomes the believers in simple English and requests Allah to keep them safe. It also helps us to remember that we will go and join them one day, God willing. Memorize this little dua, and read it on every visit.
Sunnah Etiquette at the Graveside
Courtesy is important, as the graveyard is a somber respectful place. The following are the key etiquette pieces of authentic hadith and scholars.
- Greet the people of the graves with the Sunnah dua as you enter.
- Never also sit on a grave or lean against it or walk over it.
- It is prohibited to pray salah before a grave as Sahih Muslim 972 prohibits it.
- Do not push around the graves of other families, and walk nicely on the paths.
- Likewise, maintain a low voice and prevent jokes, high calls, and idle conversation.
- Sincerely supplicate on the dead asking Allah mercy and forgiveness.
Sahih Muslim 971, the Prophet ﷺ cautioned against sitting on graves. He said that it is better to sit on coals of fire than on a grave. A hasan hadith in Abu Dawud mentions taking off sandals between the graves. This is considered by some scholars a strict rule, or recommended by others. Since rocky Pakistani graveyards may injure feet, go by the recommendation of your local scholar. Take your leave and leave after your dua, and leave other families to their prayers.
Making Dua and Reading Quran for the Deceased
The prayers of the dead are the best part of any visit to the cemetery. In fact, all scholars concur that earnest dua is advantageous to the individual in the grave. Pray you can forgive, have mercy, there be light in the grave, and Jannah. In most Pakistani families Surah Fatiha, Surah Ikhlas or Surah Yaseen are recited there. But the scholars have different opinions regarding the reciting of Quran at the graveside itself. A majority of them concur that providing charity on behalf of the dead rewards them. An example is the Bukhari 2760 where a man inquires about giving charity to his mother. The Prophet ﷺ sanctioned and most families presently present sadaqah each time they visit. To put it briefly, each time one is visiting graves during Islam, dua and good deeds should always be involved.
What to Avoid When Visiting a Grave
There are certain practices prevalent in Pakistan that are contrary to the spirit of the Sunnah. Crying, striking the face or ripping a garment is obviously prohibited in Sahih Bukhari 1294. Rather, the Prophet ﷺ instructed them to be patient, weep silently and pray to them earnestly. Ask not the person in the grave to help, children, or worldly needs. Allah is the only one who responds to prayers and thus pray to Him solely and with all your heart. Do not show off by decorating graves with expensive things, loud music, and lights. Plastic bags, bottles, or wrappers littering are also a way of disrespecting the entire graveyard. Also, remember that other families come, and maintain the space clean and quiet. Lastly, do not capture pictures of other graves or grieving families without authorization.
Can Women Visit Graves in Islam?
This is a question commonly asked in the Pakistani household and scholars have differed. Most scholars permit women to pay a visit to the graves occasionally, modestly. In one instance, Aisha (RA) once came to the grave of her late brother Abdur-Rahman. Other scholars do not encourage people to visit frequently, citing a hadith concerning women visiting frequently. It is generally accepted that men and women should not wail and mourn loudly. This is why families ought to adhere to the advice of a trusted local scholar.
Visiting Graves With Children
Having children as companions will educate them on death, patience, and family history in a soft way. Pre-explain with clear and simple words the purpose of the visit. Then, instruct them on the short Sunnah greeting and a basic dua to grandparents. Small hands must be held tight, open drains and broken graves are dangerous. Also, tell them not to play around on any grave, run, shout, or climb. These are some of the preliminary teachings that make children respect their elders either living or dead.
Best Times to Visit Graves in Pakistan
Islam has no special day of the week to visit graves. You are free to go any day and at any hour you would like. Nevertheless, Pakistani families seem to enjoy Fridays mornings either after Fajr prayers or before Jummah prayers. Others pay visits on mornings of Eid days, or a funeral, or after being abroad. There are also families who come during Shab-e-Barat but the scholars disagree regarding this practice. In practical terms, the early mornings have more cool air, are calmer and far less congested. Meanwhile, summer afternoons are perilously hot in Karachi, Lahore, and Multan. The isolated graveyards should be avoided after sunset, as not all of them have good lighting and security guard. Allow additional time on Eid and Fridays, as parking is very crowded. Visiting graves in Islam requires a pure heart, however, when you want to go.
What to Bring When Visiting a Graveyard
The following checklist is quite suitable in most graveyards in Pakistan.
- A drinking-bottle of water, and more water, should your family sprinkle graves.
- A hat, an umbrella, or a sunscreen to be safe in blazing Pakistani sunshine.
- Cozy closed footwear, as a lot of qabristan roads are uneven and dusty, as well as rocky.
- A rag to wipe off some dust and bird droppings on the headstone.
- In addition, a small dua card or Quran app to read Sunnah greetings.
- A little money to sadaqah, which you may place in the hands of needy people outside.
- Your phone has the location of the grave saved in it, and thus you get there without having to search.
There are families that also carry rose petals or little green shrubs by the grave. They frequently refer to Bukhari 218 in which the Prophet ﷺ inserted new stalks of palm. Theorists disagree on whether this practice is applicable to all, and thus, it is better to be simple. Charity and simple dua is the best present to the dead.
How to Find the Grave Quickly Every Time
Most visitors spend invaluable time in walking up and down rows in huge graveyards. New graves are being made every month, old landmarks are gradually evolving or fading. Consequently, close relatives are unable to locate the grave sometimes after months. This issue is resolved in seconds by a saved GPS location to the entire family. Grave Finder allows you to store the accurate position with pictures and basic information. Then, when you press Locate, Google Maps provides walking directions to the grave. Send the link to relatives, and they will be able to locate the grave as well. By so doing, you dedicate a greater part of your visit to dua rather than searching.
About Grave Finder
Grave Finder is a free application to save, locate and share graves. It also provides its services to families in Karachi, Lahore, Islamabad and other cities in Pakistan. Families can be searched by the name of the person or by the Grave Serial Number. A name, father name, date of death and photos can be stored in each record. Moreover, it does not require a date of birth at all with the app. Users are allowed to report any incorrect details and the admin team looks at all the reports thoroughly. You can contact the support team anytime at support@gravefinder.pk for quick help. In general, it has a motto Find, Remember, Respect as each feature is based on it.
Dabeer Hassan: Meet the Developer.
Dabeer Hassan is a Pakistani software developer and founder of Grave Finder. His two parents died and they are buried in the Wadi-e-Hussain Graveyard, Karachi. Then after six months have passed, he could not find their graves. New rows had already altered the entire area around the serial numbers even with the use of the serial numbers. That was, therefore, the point when he started to consider other families that were going through the same battle. He brought the idea to his WebXSquare team and financed it personally. They collaborated to design, construct and test the app until it felt easy. He devotes Grave Finder to his dead parents and asks them to forgive him.
FAQs
Is it Sunnah to visit graves in Islam?
Yes, it is Sunnah in Islam to visit graves since it reminds us of death. Also this is documented in Sahih Muslim 977 and Jami at-Tirmidhi 1054.
What is the dua to be recited when I go to a graveyard?
Read the letter of greetings of Sahih Muslim 975 which begins with As-salamu alaykum. Next, pray on your own in any language to the dead.
Is it possible to visit graves at night?
Yes, the Prophet ﷺ used to visit Al-Baqi at night as it is recorded in Sahih Muslim 974. Nevertheless, in Pakistan, make sure that the graveyards are well-lit and accompany at least one family member.
Is it allowed to put flowers on graves?
Rose petals are put in many Pakistani families and scholars have varied opinions. Small, humble gestures are most, and dua is much greater than flowers.
How can I find the grave of my relative easily?
Get the block/serial number of the grave in the graveyard office. Then you can save the precise site in Grave Finder into your entire family.
